Conflict at work.
WHAT DISAGREEMENT IS
Normal, and frequently productive.
WHAT MAKES IT DAMAGING
Personalising it Avoiding it until it accumulates Conducting it publicly
WHAT TO SEPARATE
The position from the person.
WHAT TO ESTABLISH
What each side actually wants, beneath the stated position.
WHY
Positions conflict more often than underlying interests do.
WHAT TO DO
Listen fully before responding State your position and its reasons Look for what you agree on Propose something addressing both concerns
WHAT TO AVOID
Winning as the objective Bringing up unrelated grievances Discussing it with everyone except the person
WHAT TO DO IF EMOTION IS HIGH
Pause, and return to it.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE WRONG
Say so, plainly and without excessive apology.
WHY
It ends the matter and costs you nothing.
WHAT TO DO IF IT CANNOT BE RESOLVED
Escalate through the proper route, factually.
WHAT TO RECORD
What was agreed.
